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Friday, 6 May 2016

How did I get so lucky?

Do you ever look around at your little corner of the world and think......

How did I get so lucky?

I do.  All the time. 

Sometimes I look at our tired old cottage and struggle to see past all the work we need to do.  And not just a bit of paint and flooring.  Salt damp treatment, plastering, wiring, demolition.  The list goes on.  Sometimes I wonder what were we thinking? 

But then I look at my boys, sitting in a peaceful moment, laying draped on top of each other like a bundle of puppies, and my heart stops.  Filled with love for these boisterous, determined little men that have been gifted into my care. 

How did I get so lucky?



I look around the little old cottage and see plaster falling of the walls and paint peeling, thinking of the hard dirty work yet to come.  Then I look past it and see what really matters.  My book cases filled with books to suit everyone in this house.  The warm comfortable beds, with cosy sheets.  More then enough clean warm clothes to protect us from the elements.  Precious teddies and toys that have been so loved their fur is almost rubbed completly off. 

How did I get so lucky?

I look at the never ending pile of dirty dishes that seem to accumulate out of no where into my sink, then I remember last night my boys eating a big nourishing meal of home made spaghetti bolognaise,  Saucy grins and little full round bellies.  We have never truly known hunger. 

How did I get so lucky?

I look into the yard at the demolition that's going on, the piles of rusted twisted iron, the burn off pile of rotting wood and off cuts, and broken old furniture past repair and re-use.  I look past the ugly parts and see the parts we have touched, and I see the soft green lawn, my herbs and flowers growing in the soil we are improving, a fence to keep my boys safe, chooks scratching away, our beautiful dogs eager to see us as they settle by our feet, just to be near us.  Fresh clean country air to breathe.

How did I get so lucky?

Sometimes by the end of the day I'm SO tired, worn out to the bone, mentally, physically and spiritually.  A kind of accumulated tired I didn't know was possible before having children, owning a business and renovating a home.  I wait, frustrated for a break.  A breather for the moment my Grant comes through the door.  But he does come home.  He comes in after his long day and picks us up.  Sometimes not in the way I want, sometimes not in MY way, but he does in the best way he can, and really that's all we can ask of anyone isn't it?  He loves us ferociously, and us him.  The gentlest soul I am privileged to know, and I get to share my life with him. 

How did I get so lucky?

I am in a season of tiredness at the moment, it seems to take all my energy to do what I need to do around here, then there is nothing much left.  My tank is low, our gate is shut.  It has been a tough 6 months.  Even Grant who is eternally energetic and optimistic admitted to me last night it really has been a tough 6 months which made me feel validated in my tiredness. 



It is my birthday today, and I have been so blessed.  I need for nothing, and want for little.  (ok, maybe a dishwasher....)  As I sit here and reflect on my life, mess, chaos, piles of washing, I wonder....

How did I get so lucky?

Much love,
Emma
xx








22 comments:

  1. Happy birthday, Emma! What a beautiful post - one that you can look back on for years to come and love reading. So much love and beauty in this. I hope you have a lovey, relaxing day, full of everything that makes you happy!

    Cheers - Joolz xx

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    Replies
    1. Thankyou, I did. A quiet, relaxing, soul replenishing day. :)

      xx

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  2. Happy birthday for yesterday! I can totally relate to this post, I have days like this too, but I just have to look at all the positives and I feel better for a little while :-)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, its certainly a matter of perspective often isn't it?

      xx

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  3. So true. When I'm tempted to think our life is too hard, I just have to remember if the worst thing to happen to us, is being run off our feet (through our own choices) then we are very fortunate, indeed.

    You guys have been hit with a triple whammy though - moving house, a bushfire and then a renovation. So there's a lot of rest to catch up on! The best advice my friend gave me after the Qld floods was, be kind to yourself, and don't be in a rush to make decisions. Being kind to yourself, just meant, don't give yourself a hard time for not getting everything in order. It was a season of disorder. ;)

    Anyway, happy birthday, Emma. Enjoy the rest where you can find it, and draw your family close. I find a hug can get me through a lot. :)

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    Replies
    1. We are actually going to take a holiday soon, 5 whole nights of R&R. With no agenda, nothing to rush off too and just our family in a holiday house, near the beach with a wood fire. I'm so excited, and relieved if I'm honest. That we can walk away from it all, just for a bit.

      xx

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  4. Happy birthday Emma. Remember Emma that your glass is always half full, NOT half empty as you have beautifully written. You are very blessed. :)

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    1. We certainly are, thankyou for the birthday wishes!

      xx

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  5. Happy Birthday! What a wonderful post. As usual I sit here reading your writing thinking "Yes! That is how I feel too!" :)

    I hope you eventually get your dishwasher, they do make things easier - in the meantime I will say that I have one and still wash a sinkful of dishes every day anyway!

    Much love xox

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    Replies
    1. Thankyou for your kind words. :)

      Soon we will be tackling the kitchen renos, then there will be a dishwasher which will be lovely! And proper cupboards and storage, clean flooring and no more plaster falling off the walls!

      xx

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  6. Happy Birthday Emma! Hope this reaches you with a glass of wine in your hand this weekend. Enjoy!

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    1. Thankyou it did! I enjoyed a glass or two of red, in my new flannel nightie, eating Chinese on the couch watching a movie - total bliss!

      xx

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  7. Happy Birthday Emma!
    Such a beautiful and wise post. It will be a good place to return to when you (and I) feel out of control and overwhelmed.
    Lots of love Rachel

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    Replies
    1. Thankyou so much for your kind and encouraging words. :)

      xx

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  8. Happy Birthday beautiful lady.

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  9. From your replies to comments it sounds like you had a nice relaxing birthday, well as much as you can when there's young kiddies in the picture. I tell you what, I'll put in a good word for you with the birthday fairies about a dishwasher for your next birthday, as long as you do the same for me :) There are days when it sure would be handy.
    Hope by this time next year, you can look back on a calmer year.
    Cassandra xx

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    1. Its a deal about the dishwasher fairy! ;)

      And my birthday was lovely and quiet, just what I needed. :)

      xx

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  10. Wonderful post Emma. Hope you had a gorgeous birthday and Mother's Day.
    This is a fabulous pic of you. X

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    1. haha! I thought it was a terrible picture of henry and I snuggling on the couch, but I put it up anyway so other mothers felt better!

      xx

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  11. What a beautiful post Emma. Truly heart warming.
    Hope you had a lovely birthday and Mother's Day.
    Mel:)

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