"I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck all the marrow of life." (Henry David Thoreau, Walden.)
With the world seeming uncertain at the moment, it's a good time to look inwards at our home and how we are living.
These needs can be met in a small and simple home, even a yurt.
But what is it in us that craves more? Why do we desire homes with so many rooms that some of them barely get used? Why do we build homes so big that they fill their block leaving no space for a garden? Why do we hanker after bigger and better televisions, and the latest interior decorations?
Perhaps it is because we envy what we see on TV, magazines and in shop windows. Maybe we look at the beautiful scenes and imagine how lovely it would be to have a home that looked like that, one which is clean and pretty and organised. But when we buy the items to create our own version of that space it ends up feeling wrong. It gets messy, the Instagram perfect white couches get coffee spilled on them, the dogs jump on them and the kids leave their crap everywhere.
So perhaps the answer is more storage, better storage. So off we head to the shops to buy the ideal storage that will keep everything in order so we can have that beautiful house. Still clutter accumulates, mess happens and we are constantly cleaning to keep the house looking beautiful.
One might look at this scene and think it is messy. Compared to a magazine image, I guess it is. But the reality is that it's just the ordinary goings on of a family home. It's nothing to hide away nor be frustrated over. It is the stuff of life.
Perhaps we have outgrown the house? So off we go to get a bigger house, a newer house and a bigger mortgage. A bigger mortgage means everyone has to work just a little more to pay it off. Of course it will need its own look, items and decorations.
Eventually we find ourselves tired. The bigger house requires more maintenance, it takes longer to clean and no one has the time because they have to work more to afford the bigger mortgage. The built in wardrobes are bursting with clothes and before we know it, it has all become just a bit too much. Because everyone is so tired and busy working to earn the extra money to afford the lifestyle they have found them selves in, relationships falter.
Money is a huge stressor on a family. There are many families who live day to day because they simply have no choice. This post isn't referring to them. This post is referring to those of us who have the privilege of choice.
The world is in a season of uncertainty. I feel it is more important than ever to focus inwards at what we have and make the most of it. To find the beauty that exists in the ordinary parts of our lives. To build resilient homes and relationships. To minimise debit if we can and simplify our lives to create a bit of a buffer. Just in case. Many of us have been living just a little bit out of our means for a really long time.
The warmer of the wood oven acting like an incubator for a rejected kid. Unfortunately she died, but I'm thankful we got to make her last hours warm, safe and comfortable.
So what can we do to make a small home work rather then upsizing? I'm not going to lie, I would love one extra room. A room for a sewing room/office with a spare single bed would be really helpful. But considering we have only just got a bathroom, which is not yet finished, that is unlikely to happen any time soon.
Instead we can look at little ways to make our spaces work better for us. The first thing is to de-clutter. Draw by draw, room by room. If you don't use it, look at it or even remember you had it, you really don't need it. There are stacks of ways to declutter and people who will write about it better than I. But getting rid of clutter and useless crap is really helpful to creating a home that functions well for you.
Creating a space for Elsie to cultivate reading. This way the books can face outwards so they are more visually appealing and I can rotate them.
Look at the furniture you have and if it is serving its purpose as well as it could. For example, our couches are too big for our tiny lounge area. I am on the look out for a second hand slim-ish brown leather two seater lounge/chaise combo that I can actually vacuum under. Along with the rocking chair and maybe beanbags for the little kids, this small shift will open up the lounge area hugely. (I actually found one which would be perfect but it's in Sydney and they are locked down...dang it!) Once I sell our couch, the cost involved will be minimal, if anything. There is stacks of amazing furniture available second hand and it is easy to buy and sell items to make the space you have work the very best it can. I can't remember the last time I bought furniture new.
Is your kitchen too small or is your dining table too big? Do you need as many plates, bowls and cups as you have or can you get rid of those ones jammed right in the back of the cupboard? Do you use all your pots and pans that fall out of your cupboard every time you open it? What about clothes, do you even like all the items taking up space in your bursting wardrobe?
Historically, homes were much smaller than they are today and families generally bigger. When lamenting the size or mess within my home, my mind often wanders back to this fact. It reminds me to pull up my socks, focus on the present and get on with the task at hand.
Rather than looking outward for what is going to make our lives better, perhaps it is more helpful to look inwards at what we already have and how we are using it.
Including that precious thing too often over looked. Our time.
Much love,
Emma
xx